Love suicide
by VCLvcl123
Summary: Castle didnt know why exacly he was on that roof at the same time she was, but he was glad he was. He didnt just help her, she helped him too. She helped him admit things he didnt think he was ready to admit.


**Okay, so this idea ran through my heaqd and i wanted to get it out there. this is just a one-shot. I hope you all like it. Please review. **

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It was one of the hardest chapters he had ever had to write. It was taking a lot out of him. Maybe because everything that was happening in the book was what he wanted to be happening in real life. He would type a couple sentences and then erase then type a couple more and then erase again. Finally he gave up, closing the lap top and leaving his apartment. He waited impatiently by the elevator and when it didn't come he entered the stairwell. Instead of going down stairs though, he went up. It was a nice day. Not to cold but not hot either. He opened the door to the room and walked outside. He liked to come up here to think. It kind of relaxed him. But he didn't expect what happened next to happen.

He was sitting near the edge with his back against it when she came out. He sat and watched as she moved a big metal object in front of the door. He watched as she paced back and forth before walking to the edge. When she got closer to him he saw her face. She was crying and she looked completely worn out. She looked over the edge and then swung a leg over. _What is she doing? _He asked himself. He stood and walked towards her before she could get her other leg over. When she noticed him she looked even more stressed.

"Don't come any closer." She said. Castle stopped in his tracks. He knew that if he did go closer it could push her to hurry.

"What are you doing?" He asked even though it was obvious. He reached in his pocket for his phone which wasn't there. Damn.

"I can't take it anymore." She said. Castle didn't know what to do. He had never been in this kind of situation before.

"Can't take what?" He asked. He was going to stall her as long as he could. Hopefully someone would see and call the police or someone would try to come up and see that it was blocked.

"I… I just… I can't take life anymore." More tears slid down her cheeks. He could tell something had happened. If he could just keep her talking…

"Why? What happened? Tell me about it." He asked.

"You don't care. No one does." She said harshly. He had to show her, that even though he didn't even know her name that he cared. He hated it when people thought death was the only way out.

"But I do. Tell me. Let me see what I can do to help you." He said. He sat down on the edge but made sure he kept his balance.

"You can't. No one can." She said. She looked down at the street and he could tell she was afraid. That she didn't truly want to do this.

"Let me try. That's all I'm asking. Tell me what is so wrong with life. I'm a good listener. Trust me." He said. He hoped this would work. Someone would notice them soon and call the police. If he could just get her to talk to him.

"You don't even know me." She said. Castle thought about it for a minute.

"Then let's get to know each other. I'm Richard Castle and you are...?" He waited. She looked at him, and then at the door, then at the street below them, and then at him again.

"Natalie. My name is Natalie." She said after a while.

"Hi Natalie. It's nice to meet you." He said. Her lips twitched like she wanted to smile but just couldn't. That's when Castle saw a person below them looking up. He was on his cell phone. Hopefully calling the police. "So, what happened?" He asked.

"Everything happened. I can't pay my bills and I had to give my dog away because I couldn't afford food for her any more. I've had her ever since she was a puppy. She was my best friend. And then there's this guy…" She stopped. Tears streaming down her cheeks. Castle could hear sirens in the distance. Just a little while longer.

"What?" He asked. "Tell me." Now he wasn't just trying to stop her from jumping. He really was interested.

"It's just that when I'm with him everything feels right. He makes me smile and when he's close to me his heat fills me with warmth. Even just the little things he does make my heart flutter. I feel empty when I'm not with him and I tried really hard not to let him in because he's known for hurting girls. I put up walls you know. But he weaseled his way in and now he's everywhere. I was going to tell him. I wanted to, but then I saw him kissing some girl. He then proceeded to tell me how he thinks he's in love and he wants to marry this girl." She said. He could see the pain on her face and for some reason all of this felt familiar.

"And then he… he said he was soo happy he had a friend like me to talk to. He said he never wanted to lose me AS A FRIEND. That's all he thinks of me. He doesn't love me. He doesn't how much pain I am in just being near him now. And honestly, I don't think he would truly care if I jumped." She said. Castle thought about it. He felt the same way. He wouldn't admit it until now but it was the truth. Just being near _her _caused him pain. He knew she thought of him as a partner and a friend but he wanted more. He would always want more. No matter what he did or who he was with. He would want her always.

"I know this is going to sound like one of those things people just say in these situations, but it's the truth. I know how you feel and it sucks. You feel like no matter what you are going to feel this… ache in your heart forever. It's like someone jabbed a stake in it and is twisting it around. And no matter how hard you try, you they never realize how you feel. " Castle said. She looked at him and wiped a tear away shaking her head. Then someone's voice floated up to them in a megaphone.

"Please get off the edge and back away." The cop said. They hadn't noticed all the copes gather below them.

"Idiots." Castle mumbled under his breath.

"What?" Natalie asked. Someone was trying to get in the roof door now but it wouldn't budge.

"The cops, not you." He said. She sort of smiled at that. Then another car pulled up and _she _got out. Castle instantly felt a pang in his heart. Just the way she walked made his stomach do flip flops. She grabbed the mega phone from the other cop and spoke.

"Castle, what the hell are you doing?" Kate said angrily. Natalie looked at him curiously.

"That's her." He said. Natalie looked surprised. Then recognition came over her.

"Oh. I didn't realize before, but you're Rick Castle, like the Rick Castle. That must be… Kate Beckett right?" She asked. He nodded. "It makes sense now." She said.

"What makes sense?" He asked. Girls always seemed to confuse him.

"Your books. The way you write Rook, always longing for Nikki. Its how you really feel." Castle thought about it for a moment.

"I... I guess." He said wondering how they ended up talking about him. "I just, I don't know how to tell her. She's had so many bad things happen to her…" He trailed off.

"You already have." Natalie said. She didn't look as sad now that they were talking about him.

"What do you mean?" He asked.

"Think about it. You are writing books about her and you dedicated the first one directly to her while telling her she was extraordinary. If she doesn't already know then you've got it really bad." She said. The mega phone came on again.

"Don't jump." The first guy said. He wasn't real smart. Castle looked at Natalie. It was decision time.

"I don't know about you, but I am going to live and suffer from this pain because at least it means I'm still human." He said reaching his hand out to her. She stared at it for a moment before taking it. Castle stood up and as she was about to swing her legs back around, she slipped. Castle had a good hold on her hand and wasn't going to let go anytime soon.

"Don't drop me." She said panicked. "I don't want to die. I've changed my mind. I want to live." She said frantically.

Castle could see everyone on the street panicking. Kate was looking up at them and even from this distance he could tell she was worried.

"I won't drop you. I got you. He said. He pulled her up with all his strength. She grabbed the ledge and he helped her over. They both plopped down looking up at the cloudless sky. "What a day." Castle finally said.

"Thank you." Natalie said. "Not just for saving me just then, but also for… for caring."

"Anytime." He said. "Now… it's time to face the music." He said getting to his feet and helping her up. "Are you ready?" He asked. She nodded.

….. ….. …. ….. ….. … …. ….. …. …..

Castle handed Natalie to the paramedics and then was hit by a fiery red blur. Alexis squeezed him tightly. "I love you so much dad." She said. Then Kate came up.

"What the hell was that? What were you doing up there? Why was the door blocked?" She asked angrily. "You could have gotten yourself killed. You almost…" Castle stopped her mid sentence by putting his lips to hers. She didn't resist. He wrapped his arms around her waist and hers wrapped around his neck. He realized today, that no matter how bad the pain was, he would go through it all, for just one moment of happiness like this.

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**Soo? did you like it? **


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